All about my Dad...

I've been without my dad for a long time now. He passed away in 1978. So...Father's Day tends to come and go with me and other than a quiet "thank you", I really don't think much about it anymore. But, today, as I was reading some friend's blogs and various post around the Internet, I started thinking of my Dad and some of the things I learned from him.

Things I Learned From My Dad:

1. I learned how to argue. I mean seriously argue. Argue to the point where the other guy just gives up out of shear exhaustion! My Dad was a master at this. While some may see this as a flaw I can honestly say this lesson has had it's good points as well. I was able to haggle a decent price on a new car all by myself. I've been able to negotiate decent pay raises and additional time off with pay at work. So, even if I can make my loved ones crazy at times, I can also talk my way out of a speeding ticket...all thanks to Dad.

2. Spend a little more to get the right one. This is a lesson that was completely lost on my mother and it was the cause of many a husband/wife tiff in their marriage. My mother was/is a firm believer in paying as little as possible for anything. She "settled" for cheap products made to look "like" the more expensive, more durable counterpart and she was always upset and disappointed when the cheap crap didn't work right or broke. My Dad, on the other hand, was of the mind that, for some things, you paid for the better brand, the better product and it would reward you by lasting a lifetime. Some things he would not scrimp on - stereo equipment, steaks, television sets, phones, golf clubs, and candy. Yes, candy. My Dad always had the best candy. And he always shared it with me.

3. Take time to learn about the world. My Dad read books and encyclopedias about other countries all the time. He poured over their cultures, their traditions, their taboos, and their politics. He encouraged me to live beyond the four walls of our house, the side streets of our small city and the borders of our country. My Dad would be proud that I have travelled internationally. He would love spending time talking to and arguing with my Swedish husband. My Dad was Irish and always dreamed of seeing Ireland one day. He never got there. I intend to go there one day, just to share that with his memory.

4. In golf and Scrabble, a little white lie goes a long way. My Dad cheated. He did! He would forget to add strokes to his golf score and turn Scrabble tiles over when we weren't looking so it would look like a blank. He would vehemently deny doing this when caught but he would try it again and again!

5. My Dad could sing. My Dad would walk around the house once in a while singing songs that he made up. He had a beautiful Irish tenor voice and he only sang for us.

6. Every time my Mom told my Dad she was pregnant he would respond in the same way. He would take my mother in his arms and hug her tight and say, "Isn't that the best news you ever heard?" I love thinking of that moment. Of course, I've never witnessed it since I'm the baby of the family but just the thought of them in that embrace makes me smile.

7. My Dad worked every day of his life until he retired. At first, he was a day laborer working for a gardener in Illinois. Then he was a Union man, working at J. I. Case in Racine, WI. Then he owned and operated his own bar and restaurant. He worked 7 days a week until he retired in the '70s. Then he made every free day count!

8. My Dad's chili can beat up your Dad's chili. When my Dad retired he became the chief cook and bottle washer at our house. He spent weeks, months, years perfecting his chili recipe which, I can say with some certainty, was the hottest, spiciest, tastiest chili ever. I have never been able to duplicate his chili in spite of having a hand written recipe. I think the stinker left something out on purpose!

9. No matter how long you live, life is too short. I was going to try to have an even 10 things my Dad taught me but I'm cutting it off short for a reason. My Dad died at the age of 78 from complications from chemotherapy used to treat his leukemia. 78 seems like a good long life but, you know what? It wasn't. I wanted more time with my Dad. Even though I was well prepared for his inevitable death, I feel gypped. I feel like he was stolen from me. I"m sure that my Dad had many more lessons to teach me and I will never have them. He was gone too soon in spite of his age. That's why this list ends. Just like my Dad did.

I hope that you've all taken time to think about your Dads. If they're still here...give him a hug and thank him. Spend time with him. If he's gone, thank him anyway. Just like I did now. My Dad's name was Vivian.... most called him Kelly....some called him Sonny (don't ask...it's a weird family thing). Whatever he went by I know you all would have liked him. And he might have taught you a couple of things too!