Happy Birthday Jan!

Tomorrow is my father in law's 76th birthday. I wish we could be there celebrating with him. He's a bit what we call a "character" here in some of his mannerisms and ways of speaking. But, he is also very intelligent and keen on speaking to the standards of education and learning. He was, after all, a teacher at one time in his life.

The first time I ever met him I was afraid of what he was going to think of me. After all, there is an age difference between Alex and I that some people have a hard time understanding. Then there's the fact that I am an American! Haha, no one will ever admit that to my face but I feel that "silent knowing" feeling when I am there. You know, "oh, she's an American..." feeling. Swedes are very polite and would never make one feel uncomfortable but over the years I have heard bits and pieces of how we Americans are perceived in other countries. So, yes, there was that! I was nervous meeting Jan for the first time. It was completely uncalled for. He made me feel completely at home, welcomed and part of the family right away. Being that he is somewhat of a loner, meaning he prefers to not have a lot of people around at once, I knew our brief visit was taxing but he made me feel so good while I was there. He was so interested in talking to me, getting my point of view and, his favorite thing to do, getting my take on all things Swedish.

The next time we visited he had moved from his old home and into an apartment. We spent long evenings eating shrimp, drinking beer and talking well into the night. One other thing I found we had in common, we liked to watch some television. Though he would not admit it, he did like some reality television - mainly of the Swedish variety. We watched one that was as interesting as it was entertaining. A group of well known Swedish singers from different eras are brought together in one place. I think there might have been 7 of them. Each night, one of them is the host/star and the others all talk about how that person's music influenced them or good memories they had from listening to their songs. Then, one by one, they'd get up and sing one of the host's songs in their own style. It was all very entertaining though I had no idea who these people were or understood much of what they were saying. Jan filled me in on what I might be missing.

I speak very little Swedish though not for lack of trying to learn. I understand a little bit. It was pretty amazing though that while I was there the more I heard it the more I was picking up. I even dared to speak it once in a while if only to say "Tusen tack" or "Nej, tack!" which means "a thousand thanks" or "no, thanks". Jan got a kick out of hearing me try and would always make sure I got the right pronunciation. I liked sitting in the living room listening in while he and Alex talked and talked. I could only make out a few words here and there but I could tell from the tone that they deeply cared for what the other was thinking about and saying. I like watching Alex with his Dad, I know their road has sometimes been rocky but they have a great father/son relationship now.

Jan has a terrible time seeing. His eyesight has been gradually going and he is almost blind. I hope that when the time comes that he needs someone to take care of him we can do what we need to do and be there for him.

So, grattis Jan! Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah! Happy Birthday Pappa! Wish we were there to celebrate. We'll see you as soon as we can.

With love and affection,
Mary