My MRI...

So I told you that I was going to have an MRI and last Saturday morning I did just that. I'd never had one of those before so it was something of an adventure.

I never knew I was claustrophobic before! In fact, that is something they ask you before they even schedule an MRI. "Are you claustrophobic?" No, I am not. Or so I thought. I mean, I've travelled on crowded small planes and trains and never felt anything like what I started to feel during the MRI.

When I first got to Kenosha Radiology, the technician told me that they thought, at first, they were going to use the normal MRI machine which is a tube that you get slid into and you're completely enclosed while they do what it is they do. Apparently, the normal MRI machine was already set up for someone else so I was told I would be having an "open" MRI. I realized later, as I was lying there, how lucky that really was for me.

So, I take off my shoes and lay down on this narrow table type thing. The tech puts a pillow beneath my feet and straps my legs down so they don't accidentally slide off the table during the procedure. I was told it would be loud and was given the choice of listening to music or just using ear plugs. I chose ear plugs because the thought of piped in music competing with the banging of the MRI didn't sound too pleasing. In fact, it sounded head ache inducing! The tech took my sore arm and wrenched it up and out to the side. A hot shot of pain stabbed me in my arm and I wanted to hit her but I was strapped down! She placed a plastic cuff of something that looked like toy armor over my arm, up into my armpit and across my shoulder. Then she wrenched my sore arm into a rubber sleeve and twisted my arm so my palm was facing upwards, forced my hand into another padded sleeve so it would stay that way and wedged the whole thing onto a table. She gave me a nice soft pillow for my good arm. By this time, I was in a lot of pain from all the manipulating of my sore arm but I was strapped in and couldn't go anywhere! She gave me a "call button" in case I needed it while the test was being done. Then she said, "Here we go!" and I felt the table slowly enter the machine.

Now, when you stand next to an open MRI machine you can see it is not enclosed at all. It's a large circular ring that you can see right through. When you're strapped in and slid into this thing, however, you can't really move your head so when I opened my eyes and saw the machine a mere inch from my face and I couldn't see beyond it, I got the strange feeling I was buried alive! I panicked a little and almost pushed the call button but then I simply closed my eyes and practiced my Heart Math. (A way to breathe and visualize to bring your heart and adrenaline back to base line - look it up! It really works!) When I did feel the need to open my eyes again I realized that if I looked slightly to the right I could see a sliver of daylight and that did a lot to calm me down. Now, add on the noise. Even with the ear plugs this thing was loud! It started out with a series of slow bangs which then escalated to a repeatedly rapid banging that lasted a long time. Once it stopped the tech would reposition the table slightly and do another series and so on and so forth. So it was banging bang bang and I was breathing in and out and counting and seeing myself in my happy place and bang bang bang and breathe and so on and on for FORTY FIVE MINUTES!! Yes, 45 minutes this took! I could not believe how long I was in that thing!!

I was never so grateful as when I finally heard her say, "That's it! We're done here!" Once she unstrapped me I almost sprang up from the table. At last!

Now there are some good things about an MRI that stand out from other medical tests I've had over the years. One - no robes. Other than removing my bra because of the wire hook and eyes in the back and removing my shoes and earrings, I was able to wear my own t-shirt. So the clothes I came in with were fine. Two - an MRI is really not an intrusive test at all. Sure, it's cramped and feels weird but compared to a mammogram or PAP smear, it's a piece of cake. Three - once you get over the tiny space you're in, if you can control the urge to run and breathe deeply, it can be quite relaxing lying there on that table. It's not uncomfortable, except for the loud noise, so if you can block that out, you might enjoy this!

The results? I have some fluid in my right shoulder joint and a couple of bone spurs in my shoulder. I might have some nerve issues in my neck but before they test for that I am getting a shot of cortisone in my shoulder, possibly having the spurs ground down, and we'll see if that takes care of the pain. If I still get the stabbing arm pain, then they'll move onto the neck and see if it's something in there. Yikes, I hope that doesn't mean I'll need another MRI. As "relaxing" as it could be, I just don't want to do it again!

Still trying to make sense out of it all...

So yesterday was Mothers Day here in the US. I spent the day at my sister's house playing Polish Poker with my Mom. We played two rounds. She won both. Now I'm $2.50 poorer. I think she cheats.

Today was Monday. I hit the ground running. It's one of those usual days. You know the ones. The work days that seem to run right into the next because now there is so much time between holidays and time off? Yeah, those. Today was one of those. And tomorrow will be the same. Alex and I are planning a trip. Well, we're talking about it anyway. We want to go back to Sweden this year and see his Dad but we don't know exactly when that will happen. A lot will hedge on how much we can save and what we will have to spend. The thing about going to Sweden is that when it's nice and warm and sunny there air fare costs an arm, a leg and your first born child. When it's dark and cold, you can get a real bargain. But it's really not all that much fun going in the dark months when the days are super short and you can't really see much anyway. There is hope. We're selling the house my mother used to live in and it's in her children's names. Being her child, I will get something from that sale if it ever happens. We've had some lookers but no takers yet. Not really the time to be selling a house I guess.

I've been thinking of taking up photography. No really. I got a great new camera and it takes excellent photos so I was thinking to really try to do something interesting with it. We'll see. I might go out this weekend and just take pictures to see what I get. It's a start.

I've also been thinking about making some more music. Now that I have this mac I have also have a music program to tinker around with. Maybe I'll get inspired and write another song or two. I haven't done that in a while but I was just singing here to myself and realize how much I miss having that creative track in my life. I've never done my own music before. I've written songs and sung to other people's music but never actually made my own music so this could be good. Or could be really bad too. Either way, it will be an adventure.

Oh, I had a physical last week. Everything was good except I am Vitamin D deficient which, I'm told, happens to quite a lot of women in Wisconsin. Mostly because of our lack of sun in the winter. Good to know now since my ultimate goal is to live in Sweden and they really lack sun there in the winter months. Oh, and I have to have a colonoscopy! Funny thing about that...every single person I have told has said the exact same thing - "The procedure is fine, it's the prep that's a bitch!" No kidding...every single person. I can't wait...I'm thinking of having it videotaped and uploading it on youtube.

KIDDING! Sheesh! Did you really think I would do that? Frankly, the whole idea of the thing grosses me out! And by the way, for all you men out there who complain about going to your doctor...don't even start. Seriously! By the time I'm done with all the tests I will have been prodded, propped open, probed and squished ten ways from Sunday! All you have to do is turn your damn head and cough! Not fair, I tell ya. Not fair at all!

Under the knife...after a while.. and yes, I AM warm enough....

One argument people in the US always have against socialized medicine is they feel they will have to wait in long lines to get any medical attention at all. Today, that point became quite ironically home to me when I had to go to out patient surgery for a minor operation. Here's the recap...

My surgery, a simply removal of a benign cyst, was scheduled for 2pm. I was told to get to the outpatient surgical admitting office by 1pm so they could take my information and prep me on time. I arrived at 1pm on the dot. I was immediately taken into a small office, they made a copy of my medical insurance card and had me sign one already prepared form which took all of 5 minutes. Then I was told to sit and wait until someone came for me. About another 5 minutes passed and someone did, indeed, come for me. She took me back into the surgical prep area and placed me in a cubicle that had one small gurney in it and a side table. I was given a hospital down and some nifty paper booties to put on and told to lie on the gurney until someone else came for me. So I did.

After lying there for an hour with no one coming to get me, someone else popped in to finally give me a blanket. Then she left.

I laid there for another hour eavesdropping on the conversations of the people in the next cubicle (they were trying to think of the name of the film where Tom Hanks was lost on an island...I wanted to yell out "Cast Away" but thought that would be rude) and the nurses at the front station (who had finally decided to order sandwiches for lunch rather than go to the hospital dining room) and the lady across the way (who was complaining about her impending colonoscopy). Finally, someone popped in to ask me if I was warm enough. Yes, I was.

Another half hour went by and the first person who brought me into the cubicle in the first place came back to tell me that someone would be right with me. I was doubtful but it turned out she was right! FINALLY, a surgical nurse came in (2 1/2 hours after I was let in) and told me that she was taking me to surgery. She wheeled me (on the gurney) through some rather loud doors and down the hall. She stopped to give me a lovely blue paper hat to put on my head and then into a large room with an odd variety of hospital equipment lying around. It did NOT look anything like what you see on ER!

My cyst was on the back of my neck so she spent some time trying to figure out the best way to get me on the surgical table since I had to lie face down. She was about to lower the table and higher the gurney and have me do some kind of gymnastic roll when I suggested that I just stand up and get on the table. It was the easiest way after all and would require far less balance and effort than the "Great Flying Wallenda" act she was putting together. So I did. Not one second later the doc entered the room. I was swabbed with some ice cold betadyne to sterilize the area and we were off. Ten minutes later I was done! I was wheeled back into the cubicle, told to get dressed and I could go! I waited all that time for what turned out to be a non-event with very little discussion about what, exactly, was happening back there as they were cutting me. I tried to ask some questions afterwards like "Did he give me stitches?" and "Will I have pain when this wears off?" The nurse didn't answer me at all! Instead she asked me where I got my hair cut because she thought it was cute. What?? I was handed a piece of paper and out I went. Luckily, the paper did say I would have pain (okay, that's not the lucky part...) but told me that I could take Ibuprofen every four hours and it would take care of it.

The moral of the story is this...
I have excellent medical insurance. I know I'm one of the lucky ones but I do pay quite a bit each month out of my paycheck for it so I don't feel privileged, I just feel lucky to work somewhere that this is an option. But the argument that socializing the US medical health policies would mean long wait times and long lines doesn't hold water with me. I have never had a medical appointment where I haven't been made to wait at least an hour to see the doc even though I have scheduled my appointments in advance and this trip to surgery and my 3 hour wait time with little to no interaction with anyone shows me that regardless of insurance, I will wait. The only difference I can see is that with one, the system we have now, I pay through the nose in order to be able to get the medical attention I need and with the other I would not. So what's the issue really?

Side note...Ibuprofen is good but is NOT working to kill this pain at all. I'll live but I will complain about it. So there...