Alexander arrives in the US this Sunday. ALEXANDER ARRIVES IN THE US THIS SUNDAY!!! Yes, I am more than excited. I have so much to do and so little time. He's shipped his things yesterday and there are all of the last minute preps to take care of. It seems like this has been a long time coming but I know we're both super excited to finally get to this time in our lives. At last!!
(You can't see me but I'm doing my happy dance right now! :D )
Showing posts with label future. Show all posts
Showing posts with label future. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Planning in an uncertain times...
It's strange how in just a couple of weeks my life and my outlook on life has changed so dramatically. All that's been happening with my sister has had a very profound effect on me. I decided to reward myself with a mental break on Friday and spent the weekend moving stuff around in my apartment to make way for Alex. Even though the future is very grey in some aspects, it is also still our future and what ever comes we have to make it what we want it to be.
So, that's where I'm at these days. More later...
So, that's where I'm at these days. More later...
Monday, August 25, 2008
Losing sight of the big picture...
I found myself today getting bogged down in the tiny irritating details that sometimes comprises my work day. It doesn't help that it's unbelievably beautiful outside right now and I'm having one of those anywhere but here moments. Of course, my personal "anywhere but here" would be Sweden and for the last two days I've been getting glimpses of that wonderland over and over again. Case in point, last night before I went to bed I was channel surfing and came across a travel show which happened to be about Stockholm. I stopped and felt sorry for myself as the hostess wandered the streets of that fair city and, it turns out, pointed out all of the places I have been. I longed to be there again. Today, when I checked my mail at work, a Community of Sweden buddy of mine had sent me a copy of the Swedish Press. Again, I felt that twinge of just wanting to be there. Then there was the sweet picture Alex sent me of some lammies in a field that he was walking past. Instant homesickness for a home I haven't even had yet.
Then, of course, there's work and all those irritations - the never ending paperwork, the calls, the questions, the meetings. One by one, they mounted up and the combination of that with my yearning to be elsewhere started to get me down. But (and it's a big but!) I know that the short term and long range plans are in motion and I have to remind myself to keep my sights steadily gazing on the big picture. I know that it will all come to me in time and I have to BE PATIENT! I think I'm going to make a sign for myself that says that. BE PATIENT!
I've been on a pretty damn interesting journey these past two years - a journey of self discovery, self realization and emotional ups and downs. And in the end, I know that I am headed to where I am meant to be - forever. So, I must BE PATIENT! If only for just a little more.
Then, of course, there's work and all those irritations - the never ending paperwork, the calls, the questions, the meetings. One by one, they mounted up and the combination of that with my yearning to be elsewhere started to get me down. But (and it's a big but!) I know that the short term and long range plans are in motion and I have to remind myself to keep my sights steadily gazing on the big picture. I know that it will all come to me in time and I have to BE PATIENT! I think I'm going to make a sign for myself that says that. BE PATIENT!
I've been on a pretty damn interesting journey these past two years - a journey of self discovery, self realization and emotional ups and downs. And in the end, I know that I am headed to where I am meant to be - forever. So, I must BE PATIENT! If only for just a little more.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
The calm after the storm...
So last week was hell. And next week will be hell. But today, ah...today, is a wonderful day. Waking up to beautiful sunshine and warm breezes with a whole day of whatever I want it to be ahead of me is a beautiful thing. I have much to do getting things ready for Alex's visit in a week but these things are labors of love so I'm having a good time doing them.
I can't get too down about the work scene since I know that I can only do what I can do there and the things that are out of my control are not mine to worry about. Yet I know that if I continue to have weeks on end of the kind of intense stress I had last week, it may come to the point where I have to ask myself those hard questions. Is this what I want to keep doing? Am I prepared to leave a job that I've had for 13 years and move on at this point in my life when having a job is the anchor of all my future plans? It's tricky. But for now, it is what it is.
And very soon my life will get better - if only for a month or so. But in that month plans will be made and the whole course of where I end up will change. And that excites me to no end. So, as these warm breezes blow, today is good. Very, very good.
I can't get too down about the work scene since I know that I can only do what I can do there and the things that are out of my control are not mine to worry about. Yet I know that if I continue to have weeks on end of the kind of intense stress I had last week, it may come to the point where I have to ask myself those hard questions. Is this what I want to keep doing? Am I prepared to leave a job that I've had for 13 years and move on at this point in my life when having a job is the anchor of all my future plans? It's tricky. But for now, it is what it is.
And very soon my life will get better - if only for a month or so. But in that month plans will be made and the whole course of where I end up will change. And that excites me to no end. So, as these warm breezes blow, today is good. Very, very good.
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