More time of indecision...

These days all I have on my mind is my job or, rather, what job I might have in a month and a half. So here's what's been offered so far...

The agency is starting up a new program which is a case management program for people with severe and persistent mental illness. This is a target group I am well familiar with and a program I could supervise in my sleep. BUT...they have decided to go with someone else at the helm which both perplexes me and angers me. I was offered a made up position of middle management running a couple of small programs that pretty much have been running themselves without any management at all for the past several years. It was a poor attempt at giving me something to do. Could I do it? Sure...easily. Do I want to? NO! There is no challenge there and I would not be using my skills to their best ability. While I appreciate the gesture, it's a lame gesture.

What gets me most is that I have all of the qualifications for the other position and the experience to boot yet I am simply being overlooked without even a chance to argue my case for them allowing me to do it. And that pisses me off more than I can say. When I get angry, I cry. I've always done this and it makes me even more angry because crying seems weak and when I'm angry I don't feel weak, I feel enraged! I wish I could just let them have it but instead I well up with tears and sniffle. So lame!

I have been told by our administration that I have excellent written communication skills yet they haven't offered me anything where that might be used. They also told me that I was a strong supervisor and that they never would have taken on case management without my knowledge and gumption yet they haven't offered me anything in a case management field. Case management is what I know and love and what I want to do. I will not waste my time and talent "filling a space" that they just need filled if it is a space that will not keep me active and moving forward in my career.

So...the decision is, there is no decision. I put it all back on their table with a written proposal and listing of my qualifications. We'll see where it goes from here. We'll see....

A time of indecision...

So, my boss presented me with a job option for when this one is over. It's not an offer I'm overly fond of. In fact, without seeming ungrateful, it stinks. It is not in an area that I want to work or will even remotely use my skill set.

So, I have to decide what to do here. Sheesh....

When life gives you lemons...

So yesterday I found out that my job may not be as sound as I previously thought. The corporation that contracts our little agency to do what they do has requested that we maintain our case managers (my staff) but they supply the supervision (my job) which means that I would be out. My agency is against this on many levels. I mean, basically, we would be paying people but have no say in their hiring, firing or determining the quality of their work or their value to our agency. Since we're a not for profit the decision to do this or not has to be made by the Board of Directors. Our Director, my boss, and the Assistant Director, are not for this at all but they know that if the Board decides not to do this it is likely that the corporation will not renew our contract at all.

Anyway you look at it my life will be changing. Luckily, I work for a great agency. Even though the decision hasn't been made they came to me right away to let me know this and assured me that they were not interested in letting me go. They told me that there are other things coming our way in the next few months and they will do their best to work something out for me so I can stay with the agency. I've been at this place for 15 years and I love the integrity and ethics of the agency I work for. There is a chance that the corporation would ask me to apply for the supervisor's position but I know that I can't do that. I don't agree with their practices and, honestly, these last two years working under their contract has been incredibly frustrating for my social worker's heart.

So the future is shaky. Not in ruins...just shaky and I'm sure I'll be worrying about this for some time now. The sad part is I really like my staff. I have a great team of workers who care a lot about what they do and I will miss them immensely.