The results are in...sort of...

So I had my MRI. And they found out I had...drum roll please...a swollen optic nerve. Which they already knew going in. The good news is there was nothing else there for me to worry about like a tumor or MS. But now there is other stuff to worry about like Lupus, Lymes' Disease, and Rheumatoid Arthritis. I had to go last Saturday and give 7 more vials of blood to get more tests done. I also had a TB test.

So now I'm waiting to see what that blood work showed. If it's something that can be treated here I'm good. If not, I am being sent to a neuro-ophalmologist at Froedtert Hospital for even more tests. I can not express how over all of this I am. SO OVER IT!

Later in April, I am going to have a sleep study. I don't need one but they think I should have one so I will. Have I mentioned I AM OVER THIS?

There has to be a light at the end of this tunnel. I want off this health care ride now. It has already taken up the major portion of 2014 and I AM OVER IT!!

My week from hell...

In the continuing saga of my on-going health issues, this week has topped them all. Even more than last week and last week I had a colonoscopy!

On Saturday, I went in for a routine eye exam. I wear glasses so I go every other year. Everything was going well until the doc called me back after dilating my eyes and said "It looks like your optic nerve is swollen." Seriously? What the hell else could go wrong? I had to go back to him on the following Monday to take a field of vision test. Basically, it's a test where you look into this machine and click a clicker every time you see a flash in your peripheral vision. It takes about a half hour. Afterwards, the they printed my results and it turns out I have no peripheral vision in my right eye when I look to the left or down. Nothing. Missed every single flash. Who knew? So, this doc makes an immediate appointment for an ophthalmologist.

So, on Friday I go to see the new guy and he has me do the same test over again. Then he takes a picture of the backside of my eyes. He shows me my optic nerve. On the left eye, it's all round and nice looking and healthy. On the right, not so much. The outside line is all distorted and mangled. He tells me that it could be fluid or a small tumor or there could be some other underlying reason like Lyme Disease or MS but that he can't tell anything until I have an MRI which, he says, I have to do right away.

So, on Tuesday, I am off to Kenosha Radiology to get an MRI. Now I've had an MRI before and one thing I learned is that I have to have what's called an "open" MRI. A regular MRI closes you in a tiny small space and when they tried to do that to me the first time I completely freaked out. So this time I made sure it was open. Open means you are in something that looks more like a donut rather than a tube and you can see the room and daylight when you need to. The technician strapped my head into this basket type thing and that was strapped down to the table. I was not allowed to move at all. My feet were elevated and my arms placed on pillows to get me as comfortable as possible. I was given a call button in case I needed her to stop at any time. So it began. I was given ear plugs and there's a reason for that. MRI's are very, very loud. The machine makes an incessant pounding noise that goes on for some time. The first part of the test took about an hour with a few stops in between. Then she injected me with some dye and we did it all over again. This is called "with contrast". Contrast is the orange dye that goes through your veins and gives the doc a different view of what might be going on. Two hours later, I was done.

Today, I get to go see yet another new doc. This time for a consult for a possible sleep study. I might have sleep apnea. Might not. Just another silly test my primary doc wants me to go through.

On Friday,  I go back to the ophthalmologist to get the results of the MRI. Next week I have yet another new doc to see and then a follow up with my primary. This has been the most annoying carousel ride I have ever been on! I want to get off...NOW!

The saga continues...

So in the vein of "anything that can go wrong, will go wrong" something else is going wrong. Last weekend, I had a routine eye exam. I wear glasses so I go at least every other year. It was the usual routine - eyes dilated, read the chart, what's the smallest line you can read kind of exam. My prescription changed slightly so I'm getting new glasses but the doc saw something new. Of course, he did. Because 2014 is my year for every single doctor I see to "see something new" and sending me on to another doc. He said my optic nerve appeared to be swollen so I had to see an ophthalmologist. Immediately.

So, yesterday, I did. He made me do a field of vision test. Turns out whatever is making my optic nerve swell is blocking my peripheral vision in my right eye. He took a picture and showed me the nerve. Yup, its swollen! But he can't tell me what's causing it so now I have to have an MRI done on Tuesday which, he says, will show what is causing the nerve to act up.

So far this year has been a roller coaster for me. I'm happy to be attending to my health issues but I'm also seeing that side of American health care that is so frustrating and costly. I don't doubt that some of what I'm being made to do is for my own good (the MRI for example and even the colonoscopy). But I was also sent to get nutritional info from the diabetic clinic because I asked to see a nutritionist to help me with my diet. I am not diabetic. And the lady there wanted me to attend 6 sessions and get a prescription for a glucose monitor and diabetic supplies which I don't need! I think it's wrong to have my insurance pay for something that I do not need. This is why insurance costs so damn much in this country! I called my doc and I'm not going back to those sessions.

Anyway, I know it's important to take care of your health. But I'm learning it's just as important to speak up for yourself when dealing with the medical professionals because once you get in the health care loop, they will keep you going on and on and on...

And the health issues continue...

So for the past month I've been following my doc's orders and taking everything he's prescribed as prescribed. Final result? I feel exactly the same as when I started and nothing has changed. I feel like shit. In fact, I went through one round of antibiotic, called the doc, got another round of something new and that still didn't work. So...

Yesterday, I had my follow up appointment with him. I have three new appointments awaiting me - one for a colonoscopy, one for a pap smear and one for sleep study. I also have to get a CT scan and some more blood work done.  Now, I'm still taking the iron supplement and the high dose of Vitamin D, something to help me sleep and Prozac. I have to take a probiotic and a nose spray. I went from not taking anything stronger than a Tylenol to taking 6 prescribed medications. I only just started them today so there's no verdict yet as to whether this is now helping me. I stayed home from work today, feeling like crap, and hoping this combo will kick in and I start feeling like a human being again.

There's always hope.

Health issues...what me worry?

Yes, me worry.

Okay, so I know my own body pretty well and I know when shit's getting real and something is going wrong. And something is going wrong.

I am so fatigued. I can barely stay awake for more than a couple of hours and the feeling intensifies in the mid-afternoon. And I'm having weird hand problems. In the mornings, my hands involuntarily spasm. I mean, I can be just standing there and suddenly spaz out and drop a cup or a spoon or something. So weird.

Then there is the walking. I'm able to walk, don't get me wrong, but I can't do it for very long anymore. Yes, some of this is my weight but there is definitely something else going wrong here. I made an appointment with my primary doc and now I have to stop myself from researching these symptoms on line because right now I've convinced myself that I have multiple sclerosis! Whew...I have to get that out of my bean and get on with life as best I can.

No worries until we see what the doc say. January 20 is a long ways away...

Approaching Christmas...

As the days wind closer to Christmas and the New Year, I've been doing a lot of thinking. A LOT! Mostly, I've been thinking about how I have to get control of myself and start taking better care of me. These past couple of weeks I have been in a lot of pain with tendinitis and arthritis and then a cold that keeps coming and going again and again. I have felt exhausted and achy and I hate that I feel so impaired! A simple trip to the grocery store just about did me in. I can do better than this for myself and I'm determined to do it.

You see, I have a lot of things I want to do and I have to be in my best health to do it. I want to go to Sweden and if I'm not walking well or aching all over, that long flight and traveling would be a killer. I want to be able to walk through the streets of Stockholm without feeling like I'm not going to make it! I just had a birthday and Ive been feeling rather old and useless ever since. Now I know that's all in my head and I have to do the things I need to do in order to get it out of there!

I am not worthless...or old. I'm totally worth it.

So, today I started to take care of me. All day long, thinking of what's best for me and why. And you know what? It feels pretty damn good. Not selfish, like I thought it might, but just really good.

So, as I approach Christmas, I will celebrate. I'll celebrate the togetherness, the quiet peace that is Christmas. I'll celebrate my family and their individual gifts. And, best of all, I will celebrate me. The me I was meant to be.

At last...

As you few faithful readers know, my sibs have been going through some health issues lately. My brother appears to be out of the woods, so that's good. My sister, the one who ended up hospitalized, is having surgery this Friday to repair her leaky valves in her heart. My other sister, the one who hasn't seen a doc in forever and who was having a hard time walking, has FINALLY gone to see a doc. They're sending her for a full work up of lab tests and they've already determined she has high blood pressure and put her on some medication. I can't even tell you how happy this makes me. Not happy that she's not 100% but happy that she finally got around to addressing these issues. She wasn't looking good and, frankly, I was afraid she was just going to not wake up one of these days.

On a brighter note, one of my nieces had a baby! After 19 hours of labor (OUCH!!) Shawn Joshua Trepczyk was born. Weighing in at 6 lbs, 13 ounces. He was smaller than we thought he'd be because he just wasn't ready to pop out when they said he would. Mommy and baby are doing fine. Big sister, Desiree, is beside herself and Daddy is proud as a peacock. The full count for me is this: nieces and nephews = 12, great nieces and nephews = 11! I can barely keep track anymore!

Sib update....

Okay, brother is recovering and may be sent home soon. Sister is still in the hospital. She had an irregular heart beat which needed to be shocked back into a normal sinus rhythm. She had rheumatic fever as a kid and this was probably something that has been brewing since then. The fluid around her heart is going away but she may have heart valve damage and may need to have surgery to repair the leaky valves. She'll be there a while yet.

After this wild and woolly weekend I've decided to take a lesson from Arnie...



He just seems to have the right attitude. Haha!

Everyone's falling apart here....

As if having a brother in the hospital wasn't bad enough, one of my sister's has decided to go and get herself admitted as well! She came down with what she thought was a cold two weeks ago but it never let up and kept getting worse no matter what she did. She finally went to the ER yesterday because she was having serious shortness of breath. They found she has fluid in her lungs and around her heart and she has an irregular heartbeat. They put her on Lasix for the fluid, and tomorrow they're going to try to shock her heart back into it's regular rhythm. So now I have two sibs in the hospital.

My brother is getting better though he's still there. They've moved him from ICU and are continuing to give him blood thinners to help. They think they are getting at the clot and he could be coming home in a day or two.

This has been a hell of a holiday weekend!!